Ouch

Yup. It's hitting me right about now.

I won't see these kids through their teenage years. Or even likely their twenties.

Last night I made the girls promise me that when I come back to visit in 5 years or so, that they won't be "too cool" to be excited to see me.

Tonight, I can't face them. It's 3:45 or so and while sitting in a huge crowded room full of pillow fights and arm wrestling, I started crying. I don't think anyone saw me but now I can't quite slow it down enough to go back looking somewhat normal.

And to think I'm not even supposed to be that emotional these days...

Remember how I kept referring to "the weight of my decision" before?

I'm feeling it. Big time.